We were engaged.. living together.. we had just bought a home. I spent hours caring for his children, packing, cleaning, unpacking and putting our new home in order, while working at my own career. We were living the life most people dream of finding.. or so I thought. Then we had another argument about his ex wife. . The coconut. She interfered in our relationship and our relationship with his children at every opportunity. His excuse was that he didn’t want them to be put in the middle.. which I can respect.. however her personal attacks on our relationship and me specifically was an issue that he turned a blind eye to. When she got on Facebook and started friending his coworkers prentending to be his wife..aka me.. I blew my top! He knew about and hid it from me. Not the first thing he hid from me I found out later. This Marine.. this city cop.. a self proclaimed man of honor and integrity who took every opportunity to criticize his ex wife for being unfaithful. . His family members for being unfaithful. .his coworkers for being unfaithful. .HE would never do such a thing! And then he did. Ohh.. he was sneaky.. he stood over me screaming that I deserved what he was doing to me. HE needed time because he was angry.. I needed to go stay with my sister for a while. He made me believe I was wrong in expecting him to stand up for and protect our relationship and me. He wouldn’t go to counseling with me but said he was going to go to the VA. And I believed him. I thought if I just kept showing him I loved him.. if I kept reminding him of all that was good and right between us.. if I kept myself self in check and just survived day to day the man that called me his gift from *** would find himself and pull his head out of his a$$ and we’d get thru it. I tolerated being screamed at.. blamed.. locked out of my home with only what I could pack in my car…we spent time together once or twice a week.. almost always making love. And then after nearly three months he crawled out of our bed to get ready for work and when I followed him down the hall and asked him about taking one of my pictures off the wall.. he grabbed me by the arms and threatened to shove me down the stairs. Yes, I know time to get out. Two weeks previous he was dry firing his weapon from behind me. I had seen evidence of him spending time in our home with someone else. . Had seen her number on the fridge.. had a conversation with his mother about it even. But I believed him to be the man he said he was and never dreamed he was THAT kind of man.. after all the nasty things he said about others. But he IS that kind of man. When I moved out he refused to let me take all that was mine. He reused to help replace all that I had given up from my own home when I moved in with him. And then he spent two hours tell me I deserved someone better than him.. that he still loved me.. was still in love with me and that we’d start over and try again. I was madly in love with him and I believed him.. I even let him make love to me again. And then he was investigated for PFMA against me ( charges his ex wifes married boyfriend brought against him.. not me) and that’s when I found out he did in fact have a girlfriend. He’d been having an affair with her.. a secretary from county of all things! Well that certainly explains why he was “out looking for tires” on Sunday mornings when he’d worked the night before. He was crawling out of her bed and into bed with me. The PFMA charges were found to be inconclusive as it was my word against his… I wonder tho.. did the county secretary vouch for his whereabouts? Funny.. I can prove he was with me for about three hours.. gotta love text messages and pictures
